It may be that you awoke discouraged on the first day of this new year. After all, you had high hopes for 2019 and things didn’t go as you planned. You may have had devastating and unexpected losses. You may have had unexplained and persistent illness. You may have fought depression or anxiety. Maybe you didn’t live up to your expectations of yourself and you feel like a failure.
People around you are excited about 2020 but you may not be feeling it. I want you to know that I understand. I had a less than stellar 2019. I had hopes and dreams that I didn’t realize. It occurs to me that a bit of grieving may be in order before diving into 2020 with gusto.
I hadn’t considered that grieving could be the balm that heals enough to open the way for a new year. We tend to dive in head first without taking stock, without acknowledging our disappointments, without grieving our losses. Perhaps doing so would make for a better start to the new year.
It may be that you want to hide your disappointment and discouragement. I admit that that’s my tendency. After all, I have an image to protect! Or so I sometimes believe. I suppose we come by this desire to hide our vulnerabilities innocently in this world of pristine social media images. The expectation to be perfect is compelling and outrageous. It hurts us.
I found this post on Facebook and it resonates with me. We are so quick to leap into the new year, hoping for a new me, looking at all that needs fixing. In addition to grieving our losses and disappointments, perhaps it would behoove us to also celebrate our tenacity and resilience. After all, if you are reading this, you have a 100% successful survival rate. That’s nothing to sneeze at.
So, I encourage you (and me) to take time to acknowledge your disappointments, to grieve, and then to celebrate the “old you”. You are brilliant. You are star stuff. You are perfect just as you are.
From that place, you are ready to envision and plan for this new year. How do you want to show up in 2020? Who would you be without your unrealistic expectations for yourself? Who would you be without access to a single thought about what others think of you or expect of you? Who would you be with more compassion and acceptance of your humanness?
Yes, at your essence you are perfect and you are also gloriously imperfect. These two ideas are not mutually exclusive. What a relief it would be to acknowledge, accept, and embrace this truth.
And if you want to play a bigger game in 2020, by all means, have at it. But playing a bigger game says nothing about who you truly are at your essence — that tenacious, resilient, wise, bright you. Look there. Look to your essence rather than to the constructed, made-up, imperfect you that is trying to fit into this demanding culture. You will find your ground there and from that place you can decide how you want to show up in 2020.
May you find peace. May you find comfort. May you live with more ease and flow. I sincerely wish you and yours a happy new year.
IN-VISION 2020 begins January 6th. This affordable program will give you the support, clarity, and traction you need to sort out your life, envision the next year, set your intentions, and make sustainable headway to creating the life you most desire. Early bird price is over, but if you email me and ask, I’ll be happy to give you the early bird price.
