I was standing at the back of the room during my business conference taking a break. As I gazed out the window. I saw a woman struggling to pull her wheelchair out of the car. I began thinking how brave she is! I wondered why she was alone and what kind of strength it must take just to handle the day to day minutia. I noticed how I take such simple things for granted and felt a twinge of guilt. I began to guess what must have happened to this young woman. My mind was a swirl of imagination about her situation.
She finally took the last step of unfolding the wheelchair. I felt a sense of relief that she was now going to be able to get into the chair since she seemed a tad wobbly. Then, she unfolded the contraption and it was a bike! Not a wheelchair at all! A bike! She hopped on the bike and quickly rode off.
Silly me. I saw something, I took a guess at what it was, I created a dramatic story, and I bought my story hook, line, and sinker. I had to chuckle at myself.
Isn’t this what we all do every day? We make stuff up. We live so much of our lives in our imaginations. Have you noticed?
COVID-19 is among us, escalating every day. I’ve caught myself in all manner of story this past month. Stories of doom and despair. Stories of hope and healing. And everything in between.
We have all kinds of thoughts; no problem there, but do we believe them or not? If we believe them, we experience them as if they are real.
Remember sweet puppy Rosie from my last blog post who is afraid of thunder? If we believe a stressful story, we will feel stressed. If we believe a story of hope, we will feel hope. This is how our psychological minds work. The trick is to wake up to our stories and question the stressful ones.
Corrie Ten Boom says, “Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, it empties today of its strengths.”
Yes, a thousand times yes. Worry is future-focused and living in worry obscures our present moment wisdom, resourcefulness, and resilience. We have no idea how this thing is going to play out. Not really. We have a lot of guesses but until it arrives, moment by moment, we just don’t know. The question may be, who do you want to be in this challenging time?
I was reading an article by Otto Scharmer this morning. He is a thought leader I’ve been following for years. He says, we can either freeze and turn backward or we can open up and lean forward. The choice is ours. The choice is yours.
My heartfelt desire is that we choose to open up and lean forward. We can do that. We’ve seen it happen countless times in our history. Now is such an opportunity.
You could start recognizing your stories about COVID-19. You could begin to examine your stressful thoughts about it. You could choose to search for and embrace the positive stories that surround us but are barely visible among the negative news.
At each moment, we have choice. Who do you want to be at this time of collective disruption?
Listen, I’m not suggesting that you become a superhero. That’s not needed or called for. What is called for is that you remain open, lean forward from this very present moment, give your best gifts, and walk through this moment by moment.
In each moment, we have the capacity to wake up to our stressful thoughts and stories and question them. We have the capacity to bring our attention back to the present moment and ask what is needed right here, right now.
This is a rollercoaster. You don’t have to move through it perfectly. You get to collapse. It’s OK. Just don’t stay there. Rise up again and again.
Yes, there will be heartbreak, illness, death, and daily struggles, but I do believe that there will be something rich and beautiful on the other side of all this if we can allow ourselves to open and lean forward.
MY WORK AS A COACH focuses on helping people move through anxiety. This is my wheelhouse.
As a result of the unfolding COVID-19 situation, I am offering one-off sessions at no charge for those who are anxious about the current state of affairs.
This is a sincere offer. I want to help and I know that supporting you will help me stay calm and grounded. I need you, too!
So, please, contact me up. I can help.
I learned a long time ago to ask for help. Please don’t hesitate to ask. There will be no charge for this call.
You are not alone. ❤️
Carla Royal, M.Ed.
Professional Life & Business Coach