In this episode, Juliet and I explore simplicity in terms of material things. Rather than leaning into a political discussion about material wealth, today, we're curious about simplicity and our relationship to what we have. We get curious about what is enough and why we celebrate people with vast material wealth.
Here’s what we explored:
high achievers can feel excited to have certain things eg the right watch
but also there's a pressure to live in certain places, wear the right things
and they report some incongruity and concern around these urges
having lived large and small, Carla's preference is to live in a small, uncluttered space
we can get caught in a misunderstanding that our security or happiness rests in having certain things
it's interesting to notice the arc of desire, anticipation, and satisfaction
the satisfaction remains for a while but before long there'll be something else glittering on the horizon and so the cycle begins again
deep down we know wellbeing and security doesn't reside in stuff
if you deeply know wellbeing and happiness come from within then there's greater freedom around stuff - you can get and enjoy things with a lighter heart
what meaning are you putting on your possessions?
our material wealth says nothing about who we are at our essence
when we confuse where our wellbeing rests, we suffer, feeling tense around getting and keeping material wealth
we're inundated with messages that point us in every direction (except within) to find happiness
it isn't the availability of stuff but our perception of material possessions that gives us our experience
we relate to material possessions through our own stories, conditioning, and beliefs and this is often the source of our angst
tune in, before all our stories and from that still place, what is your feeling about this item?
Carla's story about make up illustrates how our stories can fall away and when they do our behavior may change
when we realize we are doing things, acquiring things, or presenting ourselves in ways that feel off, it is because deep down we know we have all we need inside so putting so much importance on stuff doesn't resonate
the freedom comes when we don't have so much riding on what we have, then we can get things that appeal to us and just enjoy them
the feeling of how we live moment to moment gives us our experience; not our possessions
as we understand deeper and deeper how our experience gets created, more and more of our stories get visible to us
the masks begin to drop away more and more and we get more real
the divine, the mundane, and the messiness are all part of who we are
the experience you are having at this moment is all you have: some feel lousy, some feel great
mostly we meet our experience through the complexity of layers and layers of stories and so life looks difficult and complex
our stories can act as barriers to others, increasing the feeling of separation
the super-rich often remove themselves from close contact with their community believing that gives them a better experience of life. Does it?
we all have periods of feeling insecure about relationships, jobs, money whatever our level of material wealth
the richness of experience available from within is in a different league to the buzz of a fancy meal or a nice car
as we discover inner peace, contentment, and joy that isn't dependent on circumstance, we get to enjoy everything more because there is less on it
it goes way deeper and is way more nourishing than the short term dopamine hit of a new purchase
what you seek does not exist outside of yourself: it is within
a definition of success: being happy with who you are, what you have, and what you do
when you start with being happy right where you are, you create more space, more possibility
happiness is available in any situation: in good times and bad times
when we are scared of losing things, it's a sign we are confused about where wellbeing truly comes from
once we realize where well-being resides, there is so much more freedom to play the game of life
Quotes and References
@thefemalelead Instagram
Grace and Grit by Ken Wilbur
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