Often, life is out of my control. Things happen requiring that I simply respond. If I don’t respond, then I’ll react. I get to choose. Respond or react. Pushed by pain or pulled by impulse.
Lately, I’ve been doing more reacting than responding. As the hands of life place me in the water, I find that I am not swimming particularly gracefully. I’ll take a graceful stroke here, and I’ll thrash about there. Much of the thrashing is internal.
Even though I’ve been given a life preserver, I still don’t always trust that I am safe; or maybe it’s just that I am uncomfortable. Sometimes the water is cold! Yes, I think that is more accurate. I am experiencing discomfort, and I don’t like it.
Rather than relaxing into the discomfort, I try to squirm out of it. Rather than trusting that this too will pass, I try to avoid it or rush through it. As I attempt to avoid or rush, I often prolong the discomfort.
