http://carlaroyal.com/2010/03/growing-up/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=growing-up Witnessing the World Within and Without Tue, 24 Jan 2012 03:24:00 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 http://carlaroyal.com/2010/03/growing-up/comment-page-1/#comment-311 hann Thu, 11 Mar 2010 03:41:07 +0000 http://carlaroyal.com/?p=1460#comment-311 I had a recognitiom of the same type about 3 weeks ago. Ny partner asked me to stop playing with the dog and I didn't want to. In fact, I was furious and started cussing under my breath and stayed very distant from her the rest of the night & next day. Stayed up until 3 that night. A few days later, I remembered an incident that happened when I was 14 when my mother and my uncle wouldn't do something that I wanted, frankly needed. I started cussing under my breath and then retreated from the whole family the rest of the weekend. It is clear that incident formed my anger patterns for me and stopped my anger from changing as I grew, even though the rest of me grew. My therpist and I had been, are working on my early teenage years. It's been slow going, so this was a huge break through for us. Next job??? CHAnGE THE BEHAVIOR!!! I had a recognitiom of the same type about 3 weeks ago. Ny partner asked me to stop playing with the dog and I didn’t want to. In fact, I was furious and started cussing under my breath and stayed very distant from her the rest of the night & next day. Stayed up until 3 that night. A few days later, I remembered an incident that happened when I was 14 when my mother and my uncle wouldn’t do something that I wanted, frankly needed. I started cussing under my breath and then retreated from the whole family the rest of the weekend.
It is clear that incident formed my anger patterns for me and stopped my anger from changing as I grew, even though the rest of me grew. My therpist and I had been, are working on my early teenage years. It’s been slow going, so this was a huge break through for us.
Next job??? CHAnGE THE BEHAVIOR!!!

]]> http://carlaroyal.com/2010/03/growing-up/comment-page-1/#comment-306 Jen Wed, 10 Mar 2010 18:19:55 +0000 http://carlaroyal.com/?p=1460#comment-306 In my MotherWoman support group this morning, we were talking about having to be the grown-up no matter how much we feel like being the age our children are (sullen like a 16 year old, saying "you're a poopyhead" like a 4 year old, etc.)... It's so hard. So many days I want to withdraw and be cranky, and Lily looks at me and I think, "I have to be an adult today. Lily needs me to be an adult." It fascinates me to see how much I need to be an adult for Lily, and how much I benefit from Lily's child-ness. In my MotherWoman support group this morning, we were talking about having to be the grown-up no matter how much we feel like being the age our children are (sullen like a 16 year old, saying “you’re a poopyhead” like a 4 year old, etc.)… It’s so hard. So many days I want to withdraw and be cranky, and Lily looks at me and I think, “I have to be an adult today. Lily needs me to be an adult.” It fascinates me to see how much I need to be an adult for Lily, and how much I benefit from Lily’s child-ness.

]]> http://carlaroyal.com/2010/03/growing-up/comment-page-1/#comment-305 Lynda Wed, 10 Mar 2010 18:17:28 +0000 http://carlaroyal.com/?p=1460#comment-305 Acting like a grown up is difficult. It means that you are on your own with no one to force you/help you to do what you know you should. At our age, we need to choose to act like grown-ups, but we don't have to like it! Acting like a grown up is difficult. It means that you are on your own with no one to force you/help you to do what you know you should. At our age, we need to choose to act like grown-ups, but we don’t have to like it!

]]> http://carlaroyal.com/2010/03/growing-up/comment-page-1/#comment-303 Leslie Wed, 10 Mar 2010 14:05:24 +0000 http://carlaroyal.com/?p=1460#comment-303 Carla, I had to make that choice this morning as well. Not always easy or fun, but I'm proud of you and proud of me for making the choice. I am asking God for the strength to leave this burden with him and quit carrying it around like an uncomfortable backpack that chafes with every step. Carla, I had to make that choice this morning as well. Not always easy or fun, but I’m proud of you and proud of me for making the choice. I am asking God for the strength to leave this burden with him and quit carrying it around like an uncomfortable backpack that chafes with every step.

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